Power Play

When we were little, there wasn't much opportunity to stand out and be important. There was always someone older, or bigger to boss you around. As we got older, we got the opportunity to make our own power grabs. 

Any job in grammar school that took you out of your classroom was important, but the jobs that also gave you power over other people were even better. For these reasons, the most coveted school job was that of patrol boy. Patrol boys had the responsibility of keeping you safe on your travels and got several benefits for their services.  Not only did they get to leave school a little bit early, they also had the power to tell on you if you were caught being a jerk on their watch. An orange belt could transform any kid into a neighborhood rock star, and they knew it. 

The girl equivalent of patrol boy was door monitor. Every morning students would arrive to school early and stand in line waiting for the doors to open. It was a situation ripe for cliques and line jumping, a virtual training ground for Black Friday sales or maybe playoff ticket release day. The people responsible for maintaining order outside were the very popular door  girls. Most days the girls didnt have much to do, so they spent their time gossiping and copying each others homework. Their real power was that they had the ability to let anyone into school early. Sometimes it was a student or parent who had an appointment, and sometimes it was one of their friends. On really bad weather days it was to your advantage to be friends with a door girl because you got to come in out of the wind/rain/snow that was so common during a Chicago winter. Not quite as cool as the cheerleaders, these girls had power and they knew it. 

No way near as glamorous but still important were the milk kids. These kids were responsible for making sure each classroom had the right amount of chocolate and white  milk for their lunch periods. Every day, they got to leave the classroom to fill the milk crate for their assigned classroom, so they got a little midmorning break. Milk kids didn't have any real power, but they did get to wander around the halls unsupervised for a bit. They were lucky, and they knew it.

One very important job happened just once a year, but it involved both getting out of class AND secrecy. Our school, St. Nicholas of Tolentine, observed the holiday of St. Nicholas day. Traditionally, children would put their shoes in front of the fireplace or front door on December 5th in the hopes that they had been good all year and St. Nicholas would leave them candy. Our school would let the first graders put their shoes outside their classroom, while their teacher told them the story of St. Nicholas.

During this time, some lucky older kids got picked to help fill the first grade shoes. They had to be very secretive, like Santa, and when they were  done, got to hide and hear the oohs and ahhs of the little kids finding their gifts. Everyone agreed that this was the best job ever. These kids had the power to make magic and everyone knew it. 

Our First Job

Uncle John was one of those kids who asked forgiveness rather than asking permission. He did whatever he wanted, and was always having adventures. Sometimes his adventures got him in trouble, but he could usually charm his way out of anything. Like the time he was sent to the principal's office in grammar school for misbehaving. As he sat there, John made the principal a valentines day card. Of course,  his sentence was lifted and he got to go back to class. That's how my brother rolled.

So it was no surprise the day John came home with a paper route a week after Grandma told me that I couldn't have one of my own. ( it would be some time until I developed my own John Tolley Luck, but when I did, I would convince Grandma to let me keep the mice I had been raising in the closet.)

Grandma made us share the paper route, and that was a good thing. We learned a little about life. And about adventure.

We certainly learned about responsibility. Everyday we would deliver the newspapers, which is no small thing for a 6th and 7th grade brother and sister. Sometimes Grandpa would drive us if the weather was bad, but most of the time we walked the roughly one mile route ourselves. We had a good time-sometimes friends would walk with us on our route, sometimes we would stop at Little Eddy's hotdog stand for breaded mushrooms or some other delicacy we never got at home.

We also learned about finance. Having money led to having adventures. At the end of each week, we always had enough money left over to pay for our weekly roller skating trip to Disco Wheels, where I got to show off my white skates with blue fuzzy balls on them. I loved those skates as much as I loved skating to the soundtrack of Saturday Night Fever. Thats where I dreamt about that special someone I would someday skate with to the couples only songs. 

Uncle John was also fond of buying exploding cigarettes and fart cushions from Izzy Rizzy's trick shop. John had quite the collection of fun, which was put to good use whenever possible. I learned to appreciate the joy buzzer and the fine art of the well-placed fake vomit.

Both of us enjoyed being able to order 45 singles from Andy's Music. Though it was a music store, everything even remotely popular had to be ordered. The only thing Andy ever had in stock was old, faded birthday cards written in Polish. And sheet music for patriotic songs from the old country. If you wanted to play a German drinking song or the Polish national anthem on accordion, then you went to Andy's. Years later, Andy would take a dislike to Uncle Jim and chase him away from the bus stop in the morning.

One time we decided to treat ourselves to a meal at Carr's Diner. We really were no problem, but for some reason the waitress was not happy to have kids as her customers. And we were no help in that every time she got smart with us, we squeezed the plastic honey bear on the table and said, "temperature rising!" as the honey rose up in the bear. But we still tipped her, if for nothing more than teaching us that some people were jerks.

The paper route taught us things about the workforce and about ourselves. We learned many skills that we could use in future jobs, and we learned that whoopie cushions make us smile. Most importantly, we learned that work isn't really work if you make an adventure out of it. Stop for a hotdog every now and then. It keeps your temperature from rising.