Lost Porno

Like many married couples, my husband and I enjoy a mutually fulfilling sex life. Sometimes we watch porn. In fact, we owned one porno, Sorority Sex Kittens, one of a six movie series. As you can probably guess, it is a heartwarming story about several college women and their sorority. I don’t want to tell you anymore, because it would spoil the movie for you. This movie had been with us for many years, through several house moves, two countries, and several DVD players. We didn’t watch it very often, nevertheless, it was our favorite.

One romantic evening filled with school spirit, the topic of watching Sorority Sex Kittens comes up in conversation. It must have been several years since we had last seen the movie, and what the heck, it was our favorite.

Looking forward to revisiting this classic tail,  my fraternity man goes upstairs to find the movie in a stack of old DVDs. He returns a few minutes later with the dusty plastic box for the Sorority Sex Kittens, but no movie. Someone, at some point, had stolen the movie from us. The box was left to make it look like the DVD was still there, and the crime went unnoticed for perhaps several years.

There are no clues as to who took our porno. It could have been any one of a number of friends and family, or perhaps even an Airbnb guest. Has it been gone since we lived in St. Louis? Did it make it to Mexico?  Who knows? Obviously somebody shared our love of higher education and sororities.

All we know is that homecoming week at our house just won’t be the same.