John and Betty's Shoes

Everyone knows how good Grandma Tolley is at finding deals and saving money. Her skills are legendary, and that's where the term"to pull a Gloria" comes from. When you save even more on a great deal in the first place, that's pulling a Gloria.

One of Grandma's bargain places was a place called John and Betty's. I don't know if it was really even a store...it was in someone's garage. And the garage was full, from top to bottom, with ever-changing stuff. Extra merchandise and big items like refrigerators were stored in other nearby garages. I don't know where all the merchandise came from, maybe it "fell of the back of a truck," but I don't know. And you never knew what would be there...boxes of socks, mattresses, televisions, whatever. It was the beginning of Big Lots. 

That garage was always crowded. There were always some really old people yelling at younger kids to get something from another garage for somebody. For example, your mom wants to buy a lamp. She doesn't see what she likes, so she tells an old lady there what she's looking for. The old lady yells, "Johnny! We got any more of those gold lamps down the street?" and some 30 year old guy named Johnny would go running down the alley to see what they had left. Sometimes people would have to go with Johnny (I remember everyone being named Johnny) to look at carpet samples or big things in the other garage. I never got to go to the other garage myself, but I always imagined it to be some magical place where you could find everything you ever wanted.

John and Betty's was the ideal challenge for Grandmas shopping skills....find a bargain of all bargains in a Tetris-like maze of stuff. And Grandma was good. Thats how she found my gym shoes.

There was always a pile of old lady or little kids shoes, I think because they wore the same sizes.  Other people bought their shoes at real stores that featured styles other than Italy, 1937. But kids couldn't  complain, and tiny old ladies were lucky to find anything in their size. 

Underneath that pile of old lady shoes was a pair of gym shoes that would change my life. White leather, with red patent leather heels and toes, the sides sported blue stripes with little stars cut out of them. This was 1976, the year of our bicentennial, and styles featuring America were pretty popular. Even so, these shoes were spectacular. Drag queens would have found them flashy, but circus clowns could have worn them, or perhaps the Harlem Globetrotters? And not only were they in my size, but Grandma found two pairs of them! I was so lucky.

I remember my friends teasing me about them. Alot. To make matters worse, My friends parents didn't shop at John and Betty's, so no one else had the same style of shoes. Being a fashion-conscious 7th grader who didn't like being laughed at, I tried to make them a fashion statement. Unfortunately, I think the only stament I was making was, "Hello. I am new to your country. I know nothing of your fashion or customs."

What I really remember is wearing them to a 7th grade basketball game. I played forward for the team, as well as going after any jump balls because I was tall. We were all set up for one of these jump balls when the referee noticed my shoes. He started laughing and delayed the game for a few seconds while he composed himself.

That was it. While I was never really any good at it, my enthusiasm for playing basketball quickly fizzled. I played till the end of the year, but that was the end of my sporting career. And my need for those shoes.

I don't know whatever happened to those shoes. Or John and Betty's, for that matter. Perhaps it's just as well. 

Poo Poo Poo Poo

Did you ever see the movie, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding?" The boyfriend is trying to fit in with his soon to be Greek brothers in law, and they are big jokers. In one scene, the boyfriend asks for some help making a wedding toast in Greek. Instead of telling the family that 'he is happy to be a part of the family,' he ends up telling them that 'he has 3 balls,' thanks to the help of the brothers. It was pretty funny.

Your Uncle Jim, as you well know, has that same sense of humor. Remember that.

One summer vacation from Western Illinois University, your dad lived with us in Chicago so he could get a job. As you know, there aren't a lot of jobs in Jerseyville. 

So your dad comes home from work one day, and runs into Uncle Jim letting the dog out. Uncle Jim says, "Oh hey, can you do me a favor? Peggy ,(the dog), needs to go outside. Because she was a kennel bred dog, the only way she will poop is if somebody walks behind her and says 'poo, poo, poo, poo' whenever she stops and sniffs the ground. Will you do it this time? I would, but I'm late for work."

Your dad says, "okay," and starts following the dog as she wanders around the yard. Uncle Jim is standing in the doorway, watching him say poo, poo, poo, poo every couple of steps, and Peggy the dog is looking kind of confused and embarrassed. That's when I come home.

Uncle Jim is looking out the back door, and I walk up to him to see what's up. I see your dad, talking to the dogs butt, and Peggy, still looking confused. Poo, poo, poo, poo, walk a few steps, repeat. Now I was confused.

"What is he doing?" I ask.

"I don't know," says Uncle Jim. " I just walked in. I've been watching him for a minute or so, and I've never seen anything like this before."

It was quickly determined that this was all a joke. And being Tolleys, we refuse to let any good joke die. To this day, we still laugh about the best brother in law joke ever.

Shiny Coat

One time when you were pretty little, we took a trip to Chicago to see Grandma and Grandpa Tolley. While we were there, you needed to take a bath. Baths at Grandmas house were nice because she always had a variety of soaps, body washes, lotions and other nice stuff. You were big enough to take a bath by yourself, so after making sure that you had everything that you needed, I left you alone to take your bath.

A little bit later, you came out of the bathroom all warm and cuddly, clean, and smelling like a pretty little girl.

"You smell nice, what shampoo did you end up using?" asked Grandma. 

"Oh," you said. "The one with the picture of the dog on it."

Turns out that Grandma had given their dog, Duffy, a bath that afternoon, and she had left the dog shampoo in the bathroom. She didn't say anything, but your hair was very shiny and bouncy. Also, you didn't get any fleas all weekend.

Staying Up Late

Grandpa Tolley worked late when we were little, and most nights we had to be in bed before he got home.  I guess Grandma and Grandpa had decided that all of us being up late would not be the quality time we all wanted, so every night, one of us would get to stay up late to spend some time with Grandpa while everyone else went to bed.  It was so cool to be up alone with the adults, like you were one of them and not one of the jealous others, trying to get to stay up late, too.

I don't know long we did this, but one night in particular stands out for me. It was the night that Grandpa Tolley taught me how to tell time. 

Now, I was pretty little, maybe first grade? Definitely before second grade, because we all got watches for first communion and we could all tell time. On a side note, When Uncle Jim made his first communion, he was chosen to go down the aisle and shake hands with everyone during the sign of peace. He was so proud of his new watch that he pushed back the jacket sleeve on his hand shaking arm so that the handshakers could admire and or perhaps comment on his new watch.

Anyways, on my big night with Grandpa, he took me to his workbench in the basement. I always loved that big black workbench because it had like a million drawers full of all kinds of stuff. With the help of a paper plate and a fastener that came out of that workbench,  Grandpa had made me a clock with arms that moved. I was so impressed that my Dad made this and it wasn't just a drawing. I was convinced that he could build anything, like houses and spaceships and stuff. And it was because he had all kinds of  nails and screws, and he knew where to find them.

Grandpa then showed me how to tell time. It was easy because the arms on the clock moved. He must have done a good job, because I've never had any problems reading a clock since then. 

I don't remember staying up late any other night. What I do remember is my Dad being awesome.